i can't help but react.

a while ago, i was looking for some papers in the cabinet where we store important documents. i was looking at every envelope and folders when i saw this photo album slash scrap book of my mom when she traveled in singapore. awww. i miss that smile. it's been a while since i've witnessed her still smiling even though she's in total pain. i can't believe that i have survived without my mom who used to do my project and who used to be the only person knowing my secrets. i miss her. i just realized i lost my mom who used to be the source of my strength and hopes and smiles. i miss hugging her. i miss everything in her.

i scan the pages of the album and there i saw many pictures of her with tita marie. i can't help but react. i felt sad that she just disappeared in a snap. maybe there was a story behind it.. but i felt sad that when my mom was burried, i never even saw her friends when i was young - tito bobby, tita tess, tita marie... almost everyone she used to spend time with when we are in school.

i picture myself 30 years from now... and i wonder if i'll have the same death.. not having my friends beside me. god. that must be terrible

17. now that i am seventeen.. i want to thank the top....

17 closest people
1. celynn
2. geloi
3. kuya ian
4. aura
5. anne
6. marga
7. tiopao
8. cheska
9. mommy
10. rhoda
11. det det
12. ate jen
13. dom
14. ella
15. may (mary ann)
16. danica
and my one and only
17. mama



17 next to closest people
1. gem
2. kae
3. cheska
4. ninang dolor
5. papa
6. may (sister)
7. manel
8. aj
9. boni
10. ninang ople
11. tita lita
12. tata buloy
13. ki
14. krista
15. deo
16. alvin
17. mac

THANKS. SUPER... hmmm. oh yeah..

at dun sa first 17 na naggreet sakin since feb 1.
1. deo (feb 6)
2. chesca (feb 6)
3. UNKNOWN (feb 16)
4. anne (feb 18 sa time nila)
5. alvin
6. itao
7. aj
8. dom
9. danica (saktong 12 sa time ko)
10. ate jaycy
11. joseph
12. chad
13. mac
14. ella
15. mommy
16. ate jen
17. don

BIG THANKS

so the party for me has just ended. i've got so many people to thank for.. uhmm.. tata buloy, tita ludy, ninang ople, ninong george, ninang dolor, ninong gman, ninang lita, mommy, tito vic, papa, ninang linda and ninong alex. so there.. they all made the day before my birthday a special one.

in exactly 52 mins... i'll turn 17.. uhmm not really.. i was born at the 9th our 23rd minute of feb 18, 1990... pero... it's just 23:08.. but... sige na nga.. in just 52 mins.. i can't anymore sing the sound of music's song.. i am sixteen going on 17..

for now.. i wanna sing it .. i've downloaded it in my limewire.. i am sixteen going on seventeen. lalalalala. .. god.. another year from now i'll be 18.. not anymore a minor. shit! no way! i don't wanna rush my time.. actually, im still enjoying my being juvenile and young and carefree.

curious.. what will be happening to me on my 17th year of living here on planet earth.. god. i am so excited! ahaha.

checklist.. must haves
[ ] ipod
[ ] new phone
[ ] laptop
[ ] driver's license
[ ] sudoku puzzlebook
[ ] brad pitt dvds
[ ] blood diamond dvd
[ ] unforgettable summer vacation
[ ] trip to the north or somewhere out this island
[ ] package from someone else
[ ] lots of babyruth chocolate bars
[ ] sexy body
[ ] return of my flawless legs
[ ] removal of scar
[ ] nice happy life
[ ] lots and lots of fun

i have to have all of these this year.
kung hei fat choi... it's year of the pig.. maybe i should have a pet pig

so i got all majority of my grades go down. only 4 retained... then the rest literally went down. god. how am i supposed to make it all go up? shiznit. oh well, at least im going to the province today. ahehe. namiss ko na umuwi ng probinsya. 7 days from now then i'll be turning 17.. is that a good thing? hmm..

my piece for oratorical won... i didn't know i can write.. galing. ahehe. clap clap clap. beside me, at this moment, is nigel. too bad, he's not coming with us in the province... 15 mins from now, and i'm about to take a bath.. ahehe. excited. grabe.. i've got loads of homework to do, but i still don't want to prioritize it..

rarrr. third quarter looks like i screwed everything.. hmmm. sige na nga.. ima study.. para at least naman, i graduated with a merit award... kaya ko to!

still haven't got a college. ako yung taong pumasa pero wala pa ring university. oh well,,, sige na,.. ima fix my life.. my prosec grade went down from 98 to 90.. see how i screwed my subjects? anal geom went down from 93 - 87. aaah. sige na.. fine.. ima fix it.