alone in school, feeling sleepy.

it currently 12:35 on my watch and yet i feel the urge of just going to bed and sleep. contrary to what most people say, 3rd year for me is not that stressful, there are just stuff needed to be done for each subject and all are due day after the other.

i have the best schedule and i guess, i got the best professors... but seriously, it's different when you're seating in a class wherein everyone has their own close friends... too bad for me, in my classes, my close friends aren't there.

i was staring blankly at the blackboard a while ago, thinking what other people are doing. i feel bad that there's just no one to talk to-- my best friend's in the states while my boyfriend's still at home sleeping; my friends are in their own schools and my sisters are on their own.

it's just me waiting too see someone i'm close with.

i miss the old times when i attend classes and everyone i sit beside with are my friends. i miss the times when lunch breaks are time for childish games. i miss the times when after eating, my friends and i go to our classroom to savor the cool temperature brought by the aircon and just sing endlessly on top of our lungs... and when the lunch break ends... we're exhausted, but silently laughing at the foolishness we've done. i miss those days. i miss high school

it's different now that everyone has a different schedule and in a different school.
it's different now that the person i miss is in a different place (i wish i could hug him tightly)

it's different now that when i talk to people, the things they tell me are dead boring. it's different now that everyone's going on their own way.

i wish i could talk to someone.

i really wish i could. at this time, in this place....

at this very moment.