in the past, i remember myself being open to everyone. i never had my own world, or if ever i had, i find everyone so welcome in it. but now. a chosen few stays. and i feel as if that i have to have my own world again. a disclosure from everyone for me to be free again and for me to find myself again.

i am completely lost in this world full of strangers. i feel so endangered. i am exposed to some people whom i thought i knew well, already, but now, i find them just like most people -- they're strangers to me.

let me be free again. i am having a hard time to cope up with the changes in characters, in situations, in everything. let me have my world back. if needed, let me be alone again. i want to retrieve what i have lost -- myself.

you who have judged me have taken my self-esteem -- the only thing that was left in me when i lost almost everything. and i hate you for that. really, i hate you.

i want to be alone again
i want to find my home again
im lost, completely lost
and haunted by everything that was done to me.

i want to find myself again
in a world where i got used with solitude.
let me be free and be able to sing and dance to the music.


anf if ever i'll be myself again, i'll be opening my world again, not to everyone like before, but to people whom i know deserve to be in it.

i am in a different at this very moment, lost, wounded but struggling.