i realized that it's been a year since i last used this blog. ahaha. what i like about this, is that i only know a few who knows that i have a blog in blogspot.. so konti lang makakabasa nito.

yah. it's been a while. haha. a year has passed, but a lot has already happened.

moving on.
letting go.
finding new ones.
then letting go again.

the last one is still fresh. but... ahaha. it's over

i mean, being lovey-dovey is not a priority anymore.

just a while ago, my sister tried to kill herself. thank god im stronger than her, and the phone was just at my feet. and thank god my toes can dial. it was kinda traumatic, kaya i left the house agad when help arrived.
thank god, i was too lazy to lock the doors...

ahaha. but then, i cried. thought one of us is gonna die.

ahaha. so there, i realized that, although it still hurts to have let go of somebody, that although you don't wanna do it but you have to for yourself...i realized that... ahaha. it shouldn't be my priority. because boys come and go, and i should learn how to play this game.

ahaha. but well, mayabang ako. i find myself too kind and nice. but then again, i prefer to have a friend than a lover.

it has been a while... but here i am... updating the whole world, what happened and just happened.

im trying to be cool with things now. i mean. chill lang.
school is boring as always. too much school works and all that.

but it kinda gives me a break to my problems with my heart and at home.

oh..
and again, i realized, that i have a heart. i still have it.
and although it sometimes hurts.. ahaha. it's kinda fun to cry.. coz you're letting out things you shouldn't keep.

more next time.

ahaha. now i know...
na you're not different.
you're just like them.

now i know..
that it's time to move on.

bye assholes! :D

Karaoke. i wish i could just sing til i lose my voice. ahaha. unfortunately, i can't do that.. i can't even sing.

i am hopeless.

on the brighter side... i don't care if im out of tune. i sing if i want to sing.

so what's my point in posting this blog, you may ask...

ahahah.

wala lang.. i just lost all the thought which i have kanina. also, im not anymore in the mood to be emo. :D

CIAO!

PS. love is not love which alters when it alteration finds - W. Shakespeare.
PSS. FINALLY, being a college freshman is over. in two weeks time, i'll be a sophomore na. 3 years from now, (hopefully) i'll graduate na.

i wish
i wish

love it. love myself.


god.. im so... ahaha.

HAPPY?

wala ako magawa.

got addicted to minesweeper..??? that's how boring i am...

yes,,, im boring again. back to my normal self-- not lovey-dovey and all that.
well it shouldn't be over than a month.. but hopefully, i'll move on na.

:D

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?
ahaha.

ahaha.

ahaha.

crazy.

getting crazy.

crap.

i remember one time talking to anne and telling her that im wishing for someone. i remember that moment when i was walking with someone whom i've just met and telling him to shut up because i've seen a falling star and because im wishing. i remember those nights when i have to stop myself from crying too much but ending all those sad thoughts with a wish. i remember those times when i don't forget to wish on my wish sticks and burn it while having my eyes closed because im wishing. i remember anne telling me that i am a person who wishes every chance i get. i remember her labeling me as her wish bear (from the care bears). and i remember that all these happened because of that wish i am forever grateful of because it got granted.

just like all kids (and i guess all adults too) there would come a time that you wish for happiness. i've made a wish to have that too. but in a different way. i remember myself wishing for that one person... that one person whom i have been wishing since i was 8. ahaha. don't get me wrong. but whom you might be thinking of might not be that person.

yah. i've wished for him since i was 8. funny right? you can't blame me! i was a kid then who wishes to have all her wishes come true.

then poof. i got my wish. things didn't really go well, and everything ended up the way i didn't expect it to be. but during all those sleepless nights.. and with all those misery is another wish granted for me. i wished that he'd be happy.

just like what i have said... he did become happy. wow! God knows how happy i am for that person. God knows how many times i've wished for that.

but now i am left alone. true, someday, you'd be just part of my history. and no matter how sad it may seem... no matter how true things would be... i guess everything has happened for real. that even though i never wished for it... time would come that i have to wish for someone... someone better than you.

being legal has so many priviledges... and im enjoying most of it.
right now, im trying to be loveydovey and all that.. even though i am so not... but i dreamt of some asshole last night and we had so much fun drinking... kaya.. although my friend and i were really miserable last night at drews... ahaha. we raised a toast for being loveydovey.

so what have i done lately?
my birthday was... ahaha. fun
i got so many surprises from my blockmates and from aura and anne. i even got surprised that everyone dressed up for me... guys were in polo and girls were in dresses. my special 18 were actually in long sleeves... ahaha. include deo who surprisingly showed up. :D

teehee.

anyway...i guess there's more to come for me this year.

:D

it's been a while. 1 month. february starts in a while. january went pretty hmmmm. weird-- dirty old man, classes in nikka's place, bahay kubo, loveydovey talks, staying up late, hell weeks, parties. a lot has happened on the 1st month of my year. and guess what?!?!

depression? hmmm. im continuing in my moving-on moves.. but im so loveydovey today, so i can't help but stay loveydovey.

:D

with no heart to give... i can't love anyone else..

feb 1 starts in 1 hr and 24 mins.

hmmm. how will my 2nd month be?